Chapter 7: Silence and solitude

Mark 1:35 gives us a small scene that is easy to skip: "And rising very early in the morning, while it was still dark, he departed and went out to a desolate place, and there he prayed." Then the interruption: Simon and the others hunted for him and said, "Everyone is looking for you."

That sentence could be written on any phone screen today. Everyone is looking for you. Comer's chapter on silence and solitude begins with Jesus's pattern of slipping away to lonely places to pray, and notes how the noise of modern life crowds out our ability to hear God. Jesus didn't wait until the demands were over. He walked out before they began.

The book defines solitude as time alone with God and your own soul. That definition has two edges. First, it's with God. Being alone with a screen isn't solitude. Second, it's with your own soul. Part of what quiet exposes is what's going on inside us, which is exactly what busy people avoid. Comer also separates solitude from isolation. In isolation we hide or escape. In solitude we turn toward God. The difference is the direction of your face. Scripture knows both: Proverbs 18:1 warns about the person who cuts himself off from others, while Jesus goes off to pray and then returns to people.

Comer adds that quiet is needed both outside and inside. You can sit in a silent room with a roaring mind. And the book compares secular mindfulness to silence and solitude without Jesus. The comparison is respectful but pointed. Calm breathing can help, but Christian silence is not an empty mind. It is a listening one, aimed at a Father who is present.

He draws on Henri Nouwen's conviction that without solitude a spiritual life is nearly impossible, and also suggests that idle gaps, like waiting in line or sitting in a parked car, can become openings for prayer. That matters for anyone who thinks they have no time. Solitude can start small.

Notice also that in Mark 1 Jesus's retreat isn't selfish. It's the source of what he gives. Later in the chapter he tells the disciples he must go elsewhere to preach, and he doesn't let the urgency of the crowd set his direction. His time with the Father did.

A care note: if time alone tends to bring dark thoughts, numbness, or a pull to hide from everyone, that is a good reason to talk with a pastor, counselor, or trusted friend. Silence is meant to be a door toward God, not a place to be stuck alone with pain.

For most of us, the first step is humble. Pick a short, protected stretch. Go somewhere quiet. Put the phone out of reach. Let the first few minutes feel awkward. Then say, quietly, "I'm here."