Session 6 · Galatians 4:4-7
Abba's Child: Tenderness Toward Others
If God is tender with you, what does that do to how you treat people you struggle with?
Book reading: Chapter 4 (Abba's Child)
Read Chapter 4 first. Manning presents the heart of God as compassion and tenderness, then asks a hard follow-up question: what happens to the way we treat other people when we really believe that? He applies it to people we disagree with or find hard to accept. In his telling, there is a third way between permissiveness and sanctimonious moralism. That way is grounded in God's word and shows up as compassion that doesn't pick and choose.
Paul's words in Galatians give us the root of that idea. God sent his Son "to redeem those who were under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons." Then comes the part that is easy to read past: "because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, 'Abba! Father!'" Notice who is doing the crying. The Spirit is crying out inside you. Your belonging doesn't depend on how well you speak to God. It is something God has done and keeps doing. "So you are no longer a slave, but a son, and if a son, then an heir through God."
Here is the link to other people. A slave is always measuring, always checking who is in good standing and who is not. A child who knows they are secure doesn't have to keep score. They have nothing to protect. That frees you to be tender with someone you disagree with, because their presence no longer threatens your standing.
Look at how Jesus did this. Matthew says that when he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless (Matthew 9:36). In John 8, he refuses to join the men ready to stone a woman, and he also doesn't pretend her sin didn't matter. He tells her he doesn't condemn her and sends her out to leave her sin behind. That is the shape of what Manning calls a third way. Truth and grace arrive together. John says Jesus came "full of grace and truth" (John 1:14), and Paul says we are to speak the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15).
Christians don't agree on every question, and this chapter touches some tender ones. Romans 14 is a good guide for the tension. Paul tells believers not to despise or judge each other over disputed matters, because each one answers to the Lord. Holding a conviction and holding it gently can go together.
One caution. Tenderness is not the same as staying close to someone who hurts you. You can pray for a person and wish them well from a safe distance. If a relationship involves abuse or ongoing harm, please talk with a pastor, counselor, or trusted friend about what safe looks like.
Key idea
Knowing you are secure as God's child frees you to hold your convictions while treating people you disagree with the way Jesus treated people: with truth and tenderness together.
Questions to consider
- Who comes to mind when you think of someone you find hard to accept or disagree with? What do you usually feel toward them, and what does Galatians 4:4-7 say about where your own standing comes from?
- Where do you tend to lean: toward permissiveness (avoiding hard truth) or toward sanctimonious moralism (truth without tenderness)? What would one small step toward the third way look like?
Journal prompt
Write a short note to God about one person you struggle to treat with tenderness. Tell God honestly how you feel, then write one sentence about how Jesus might look at that person.
Practice
1. Choose one person you disagree with or find hard to accept. 2. For five minutes, pray slowly through Galatians 4:6-7 for yourself, then ask God to show you that person the way he sees them. 3. Do one specific kind thing for or about them this session (a word, a prayer, or holding back a critical comment). If safety is a concern, make your kindness a prayer only.